kjartanthemagnificent:

Bristol Palin’s Anti-Teen Pregnancy Ad

“What if I didn’t come from a famous family?

What if I didn’t have all their support?

What if I didn’t have all these opportunities?

Believe me… it wouldn’t be pretty.

Pause before you play.”

—Bristol Palin

Translation:

“Hi, I’m Bristol Palin, daughter of former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin.

I had unsafe sex and got pregnant as a teenager because my parents and I are of mediocre intelligence and were raised on the foolish and dysfunctional teachings of the fundamentalist religious right.  I supported abstinence only education, had sex with my boyfriend, and then continued to support abstinence only education. This made me both a hypocrite and a teenage mother.  But it doesn’t matter.  Because I belong to a famous family and have access to my politician mother’s support system of lawyers, managers, and publicists.

But can you imagine if I didn’t have all that?  Can you imagine a world where I, Bristol Palin, TV spokesperson, live a lifestyle comparable to the average American teenager?  Why, such a world would no doubt be populated by barking cats and legged fish constructing sideways skyscrapers beneath a purple sky! Plus, being a teenage mother would be a stabbing pain in the ass for me.

So to all you teenagers watching this: Don’t get pregnant.  Not because manifesting a human life is a staggering responsibility and unplanned or unwanted children are often raised poorly or outright abused thus creating legions of maladjusted assholes that make life miserable for the entire human race, but because raising a kid when you’re a teenager and not rich and famous is a total hassle.

Think about how low class you are before fucking.”

(Reblogged from kjartanthemagnificent)

Notes

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